Now Entering The Realm of Mike Kill...

aka:

BAHRCHSCHEESEZ

"THE MAN WHO IS LARGER THAN LIFE"

and meal worms too!

Q. Can you afford $300 a month? Come live at my house!

A room is available, waterfront view, huge backyard, privacy,

digital cable, internet, dock, use of boat, grapevine with grapes,

orange tree, ample parking, 100 dvd collection to select

entertainment from, own bathroom, utilities included.

you can be one lucky new roommate!

email here or call 727-207-3949 or 727-243-2034

 What does the house look like? Its the one on the front page of hudsonfla!

 The roommate section of Mike's page sponsored by

Q. CAN YOU FIND ALL SEVEN HIDDEN EX PRESIDENTS ON THIS PAGE?

E MAIL ME IF YOU FIND THEM AND I WILL COMPENSATE YOU GREATLY

meximeltmike11@hotmail.com

ANSWER POSTED AT THE BOTTOM

For up to the minuit info and pics, check out 9218.org!

7 X-Presidents and email address sponsered by

PARTS OF MY LIFE I REMEMBER

     I grew up in Ferndale Michigan, the first city north of Detroit, as you enter the suburbs. I lived at 666 West Hazelhurst, with my Mom Susan, my Dad Matthew and my two siblings Chris and Sheryl. 666 was a bit of a strange setting for the Kill household, getting stuff delivered was more hassle than anything else, I am surprised the mail man just didn't throw the mail on the lawn and keep going. My parents worked hard to care for us, both worked a long forty hours a week. We did all the family things, Barbeque's, fireworks, Christmas and Thanksgiving dinners. You would have thought that Chris, Sheryl and myself would get along well and be each others best friend, which I assure was not the case. We three different people with three contrasting personalities, who do our own thing. By the time I was going into high school my brother had graduated and was working, and my sister was a senior who was preparing for the success she was always destine for at Michigan State University. She did her best to try and get my feet wet as I was going into high school, but like I said there was a lot of contrast in our social groups. She did things for me like introducing me to some friends of her who were on the Cross Country team and convinced me to join, I stuck with that for my entire four years of high school and did pretty well considering I never ran a lick in my life. She was tapping into my niche for love of sports to get aquatinted with some people so I wasn't totally intimidated when I entered high school. These were great gestures from someone I pissed of all the time and did nothing but sponge off of. It was that same summer in 1994 that I was on a baseball team. Little did know the long term effects of this team. I had always been on crappy teams but this team was actually good and I probably didn't deserve to watch them let alone be on the roster. It was at a post year celebration when we lost in the playoffs that I met up with a couple of guys who for the most part played my position. I was left handed so when I wasn't pitching I generally played first base. On this team there were two first baseman Dave Tamm and Frank Floros. Everyone was partying and having a good time but I was pretty lost. I struck up a conversation with Dave and found we had a lot in common. I wouldn't talk to Dave again until a week later when he drove to my house and asked for some spare change to keep his car running. Of course I was only 15 and broke myself so he took me to the store where we got three dollars for my parents beer and pop cans. This day would be the start of a life long friendship that started on a three dollar loan. My first two years at FHS I would mostly hang around Dave and Frank which for the most part consisted of high school sports and Tiger games. During the season though Frank would distant himself for us, he never wanted to partake in all the extra running we usually found ourselves going through. Since we were both pretty good runners the coaches never found it funny when Dave would wear his Metallica shirt, I would wear my AC/DC shirt and we would run laps grunting and laughing like Beavis and Butthead. Two years would fly by and that would send Dave and Frank off with their lives. Frank went to the Navy aboard the U.S.S. John F. Kennedy, and Dave would eventually graduating from Michigan State University. However, with those two gone and the always reliable Sheryl gone I had no social direction. I had lots of friends but no one like Frank or Dave. After they left in August 1996 I was left to wonder who was going to help me strategically place a bloodied t-shirt's in the court yard for the biology teacher to find, or who was going to go on late night town decorating excursions. That was when I met up with Mike Gougherty, and his neighbor Lara Bolz. Gougherty and I always knew of each other but never really hung out together. He grew up on the same part of town as my cousins Andy and Brian Kill, a part of the city I would only go to on occasion. Now I found myself playing basketball and tennis constantly with Mike, and Andy. Mike and I got to know each other pretty well just from that, and even though he would go on to be Michigan Wolverine along but we still carried a bond. I graduated in 1998 and Mike would go to University of Michigan and so would Lara, so there I was again stuck with nobody. That summer I gained closer friendships with these two guys Miguel and Karl. Eventually I would get bored with my life and transferred from Oakland Community College, to Eastern Michigan University. I chose EMU because of it's location, to nearby U of M, where Mike and Lara  were. I lived in the dorms my first year at Eastern, up at Hoyt, what I call the "Mansion on the Hill." It was there that I met Jeff Licavoli, from Portage Michigan. Portage was near Kalamazoo and our friendship is proof that you don't judge a book by it's cover. We have completely different interests, but were perfect roommates and remain good friends. At the end of the year Jeff went back to portage and I went to live with this guy I met at work, "Big Fat Kyle." I lived in the River Rain apartments just off campus and pretty much had the place to myself all summer since Kyle was gone all the time. The summer was my first summer out of the house and was filled with visits from Dave who had just recovered from his trip to Europe. We went to about a million Tiger games at New Tiger Stadium, and even built our own boat for five dollars. The boat was made from wooden pallet, a bunch of empty milk cartons, Whisk & Tide bottles, and the "Grandmaster." We sailed down the rough rapids of the Huron River until we got shipwrecked, it was probably on this day that  Dave got that irreversible skin disease and mutated foot. At the end of the summer though rent was going to bee too high for me to afford so I had to move out. I got in touch with Bryce Ford, a childhood friend, and  Eastern Student. He was putting together a house for  six people to live in. Not having any choice I accepted, and signed a lease drawn up by Satan himself, and lived in his house at 20 North Summit in Ypsilanti Michigan. The people in the house I barley knew just from parties and stuff. It started out with Bryce, Gino, Tito, Shipp, Pat Bastard, and myself, it took one party and we were living with eleven people. Some guys slept in the garage, on the porch, next to the water heater, on just a plan old therapeutic box spring, wherever. I was usually around rent time they would all disappear. Not the rent was ever on time, or the house conditions were acceptable, but it seemed to be the more the merrier. I should have known things were rotten when we exchanged the goat Pat Bastard stole from a petting farm for cute bunnies who would eventually turn on us. We had many nights observing the actions of Jimmy Giptis, Buster (M.I.A. sorry Frrrrezzty), Sir Loin, and my bunny Stigger. This year of mayhem would leave me with no material belongings, and all of us with credit reports that could make Enron look like they were doing good thing. Or when I received a loud party ticket while playing games and listening to Neil Diamond, when I pleaded my innocence I was told I could get a ticket for listing to Neil Diamond and that the one I was getting was a cheaper fine. It was in February I started to lose my sanity and got really ill due to the living conditions, I am guessing that stolen barbeque chicken from a catering event sitting on an oven for over three weeks is not healthy. I finished out the year and checked out with a clean bill of (government testing was inclusive at time of publishing). We all went our own ways I went to Seattle and lived with my sister for a while. She was working for Boeing September 11, she was promptly laid off and went back to Detroit, and I came here to Hudson. I live with Dave who is kept locked in a cage in the back of the house, once and a while I will unlock his cage to let him eat croutons or something. I still keep in touch with my old roommates though. This Summer Dave and I invaded the Capitol to see Bryce and Pat Bastard and create some havoc. After we got the boot off the car we went to New York City for New Years 2004, where I got read my Miranda's, Dave made good quality friends, Bryce stayed good, and Bastard is still trying to remember (pictures below). It has been a good start, and I expect a stellar finish.

Biography section sponsered by:

PARTS OF MY LIFE I CAN ONLY REMEMBER WITH PICTURES

Mike and Dave Meeting Frank at the airport (Cheapskate couldn't call a cab)

GOUGHERTY (center) Striking a pose after MSU'S 2000 Basketball Title

MIKE, BRYCE, AND PAT BASTARD BEFORE MIKE LEFT FOR SEATTLE

Pat Bastard Appearance sponsered by

MIKE GOING THROUGH NORTH DAKOTA, JUST PAST GLEN ULLIN

MIKE (foreground) IN YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK (MIGRATED YOGI BEAR BACKGROUND)

Mike and Dave on Clearwater beach, it looks like Dave was the other end of a Hoganesque clothesline

MY TRIP TO THE WINDY CITY

PICTURE OF ME HOLDING THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT

BASTARD AND DAVE KEEPING OUR NATION SAFE

Pat Bastard appearance at the White House sponsered by

YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE

A BITTER LOOK ON MY FACE AFTER SMELLING BRYCE'S FART

THE REASON HE FARTED, NACHOS FROM CAMDEN YARDS IN BALTIMORE

Bryce's appearance sponsered by

BASTARD MAKING NEW FRIENDS

Pat Plastered and the NYPD sponsered by

MIKE IN TIMES SQUARE, HE'S REALLY HAPPY BECAUSE HE JUST SAW THE GIANT ANIMATED SIGN FOR RAMAN NOODLES

LADY LIBERTY, PERHAPS

BRYCE, BASTARD, AND SOME SCOUT LEADER APPRECIATING SOME OF FLA'S CRITTERS THAT ARE NOT IN TRAILERS IN HUDSON

Phat Phag Phat Pat Plastered with tortoise sponsered by

                                             /

MIKE'S RESUME

THEY CALL ME THE WORKING MAN

WORK EXPERIENCE:

LOCATION: Checkers Drive In Restaurants Port Richey Florida

CONTACT: Tom Ross (727) 849 1467

POSITION: Shift Manager or Liaison

TENURE: January 2002 - Present

REASON FOR LEAVING: Two years strong and still going!

LOCATION: Quizno's Sandwiches Thrashers Corner, Bothell Washington

CONTACT: Todd Wurl (425) 483 5152

POSITION: Assistant Manager or "Kaptain Kwizno"

TENURE: August 2001- January 2002

REASON FOR LEAVING: I never wanted to leave Quizno's it was a great job, but post 9/11 housing circumstances forced me to change my livelihood

LOCATION: Little Beaver Tree and Lawn/Ypsilanti Michigan

CONTACT: Mark C. Welker (734) 481 3347

POSITION: Foreman

TENURE: May 2001 - August 2002

REASON FOR LEAVING: Good job, paid really well, but concern for personal safety and mental stability of my boss helped me make my decision to leave.

LOCATION: Tio's restaurant Ypsialnti Michigan

CONTACT: Jami Campbell (734) 528 4444

POSITION: Driver

TENURE: March 2001 May 2001

REASON FOR LEAVING: Tio's was really good to me, too bad the cars I drove didn't treat me as well.

LOCATION: Lovers Lane Ypsilanti Michigan

CONTACT: Marissa (734) 487 9201

POSITION: Cashier

TENURE: January 2001 - June 2001

REASON FOR LEAVING: I no longer found it necessary to work two jobs while working my Landscaping job

LOCATION: Bill Knapps Ypsilanti Michigan

CONTACT: Jerry Peru N/A

POSITION: Cook, Server, Tabel Cleaner

TENURE: May 2000- November 2000

REASON FOR LEAVING: After remodeling all their stores Bill Knapp's was making an effort to change their image. In doing so their only succeeded in literally scaring away their senior cliental, as a result it was "Knapp Time"

LOCATION: Pittstop Campus Store Ypsilanti Michigan

CONTACT: Eastern Michigan (734) 487 0400

POSITION: Cashier known as "Pittstop Mike"

TENURE: September 1999-June 2000

REASON FOR LEAVING:  Pittstop provided me an opportunity to network, however, my job only lasted as long as Fall and Winter semesters.

EDUCATION:

PASCO-Hernando Community College: Enrolled

Cascadia College: Transfer

Eastern Michigan University: Completed 2 years transfer

Oakland Community College: Transfer

Ferndale High School: Graduated

Mike's Resume sponsered by

OUTLOOK:

As it stands right now I have every intention of finishing my schooling here in Florida. In my future I hope to be returning to the Midwest this time to Chicago. I have been able to gain a lot of life experience through my travels and through the people I have met. I have been able to see things most people my age have not, I have been fortunate to meet people that have taught me a lesson or two. I am grateful for my knowledge on life and plan on continuing my everyday prosperity.

 UPDATES:

I just got my future told to me, and as much as I try to stay optimistic the print out of a blank of piece of paper makes it hard. I also bought new underwear, and socks. My magazine subscriptions are still coming so thank you Eddie Anderson for keeping up on your bills. Also I blacked out in the middle of the and vomited in various bags. School is going, and I changed deodorants.

SO CHEERS TO THAT!

(THAT"S MY BOAT)

  This update sponsered by

UPDATE ON THE UPDATES

IN OTHER RECENT NEWS I PAINTED MY ROOM KELLY GREEN, BOUGHT SOME PICTURES, AND CHANGED THE SWITCH PLATE. I AM ALSO HOLDING A CONTEST TO SEE WHO CAN NAME THE EX PROFESSIONAL WRESTLER PICTURED BELOW. WINNERS WILL RECEIVE A JAR OF PICKLES, A CASSETTE TAPE WITH THE HBO VERSION OF SPACEBALLS FROM THE ORIGINAL AIR DATE, AND A CHANCE TO DO MY LAUNDRY, ALL PARTICIPANTS WILL MOW MY GRASS.

call 727 207 3949 with your submissions

(HE WON THE BELT FROM  TAKERU KOBAYAHI, HAS A STEADY DIET OF ENSURE AND WAS ADDICTED PINE-SOL)

Tom Appearance sponsered by (becides all of the above)

A.. THERE ARE NO PRESIDENTS I TRICKED YOU INTO LOOKING AT THE ENTIRE PAGE

Mike's Life brought to you by

 ALL THIS JUNK ABOUT MIKE IS SPONSORED BY THE CRAP ON THIS AD, SO CLICK HERE!

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